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December 15, 2007

I am not making as much progress in studying as I was earlier this week. The problem is a familiar one. It seems like it happens every year, and this year is no different: I am missing that sense of urgency. I’m just not scared. This year is different, though. Usually I’m not scared because I know I have time and my brain thinks it works better under pressure. This year, though, I have an additional factor—I am too comfortable with the material. I’ve enjoyed this class a lot, more than I expected to, and I have an affinity for the kind of analysis required. So not only do I have plenty of time, but also I’m just not worried about the material. (Note: I should be worried—no exam is easy enough to take without some serious preparation. This is just my brain tricking me into being lazy.)

At any rate, I’m struggling to motivate myself when all I really want to do is curl up in front of the fire with my dog and wait out the snow. After a semester of doing nothing but working, working, working, under high levels of stress and while dealing with many, many frustrations, I kind of feel like I deserve a more relaxing exam period, especially when I only have one exam. But I also have a hard time escaping from the guilt of not working when I have work to do.

Categories: 3L
  1. LL
    December 15, 2007 at 6:15 pm

    I’m like you- I won’t be productive until I’m truly pressed for time, but I’ll feel guilty doing non-exam things so I waste time in little pieces while “studying”. I usually look back and wish I’d just given myself permission to take a day or two off and just relax- I’d probably get more done overall.

    So I think you should enjoy the beautiful snow, the warm fire, and snuggles from your dog and/or Mr. Angst. You’ll be more productive tomorrow out of guilt for taking time off and knowing that you have that much less time to prepare. Good luck!

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